Times of India...

The day ROBOT was released,

Rajnikanth gave Times of India

a rating of 4 stars :)

Madame Tussauds...

Beat this Breaking News:

Rajnikant to have a
wax statue of

Madame Tussauds

at his home...

Teachers Day

Once
Spiderman
Superman
Batman
James Bond
Ironman
Shaktiman
Krrish all visited Rajnikanth..
So, do u knw which day it was..?
Teacher's Day :)

Over speeding...

Once Rajnikanth Was Caught On The Highway fOr Over Speeding . .
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While Walking ...

Mobile battery charge...

Beat this:

I have so many RAJNIKANTH messages on my handset

that I don't need a charger anymore

to charge my mobile!!! ;-)

Rajni award....

And the RAJNI Award...


goes to ...

OSCAR...!!!

Guiness Book...

As a kid Rajnikant maintained a diary of his day to day activities...

Today it is called..
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The guiness book of world records...! :-P

Log Table...

Try beating this one. 


One nite,
while asleep,
Rajnikant was mumbling some random numbers.....


Thats how the Log table was invented...

RECESSION

Try beating this.


In 2008 Rajnikant lost his Wallet


And


the world went into a RECESSION.

Will...

Where there is a will there is a way...


but...


where there is Rajnikant there is no other way...

OH MY RAJNEEKANT

What does GOD say when HE himself is worried???????? ----

-" OH MY RAJNEEKANT!!!!!!!"

Paul the octopus...

Paul the octopus was asked to predict Rajnikanth's death...

Paul died yesterday !

Train jumps off the track!

Rajni in Tamil remake of Aamir's Ghulam.

Rajni runs on railway track the train is now at a distance of 1 meter...



Now what?



Obviously the train jumps off the track!

Rajni Mania...

Rajnikanth was bragging to Amitabh Bachan one day, "You know, I know everyone. Just name someone, anyone, and I know them. Tired of his boasting, Amitabh Bachan called his bluff, "OK, Rajini how about Tom Cruise?"

"Sure, yes, Tom and I are old friends, and I can prove it" Rajini said.

So Rajini and Amitabh Bachan fly out to Hollywood and knock on Tom Cruise's door,

And sure enough, Tom Cruise shouts : "Thalaiva! Great to see you! You And your friends come right in and join me for lunch!"

...Although impressed, Amitabh Bachan is still skeptical. After they leave Cruise's house, he tells Rajini that he thinks Rajini knowing Cruise was Just lucky.

"No, no, just name anyone else" Rajini says
..."President Obama", Amitabh Bachan quickly retorts
..."Yes", Rajini says, "I know him.

And off they go. At the White House, Obama spots Rajini on the tour and motions him, saying, : "Rajini, what a surprise, I was just on my way to a meeting, but you and your friend come on in and let's have a cup of coffee first and catch up".


Well, Amitabh Bachan is much shaken by now, but still not totally onvinced. After they leave the White House grounds, he implores him to name anyone else.

"The Pope," Amitabh Bachan replies

..."Sure!" says Rajini, "My folks are from Italy and I've known the Pope a long time".

Rajini and Amitabh Bachan are assembled with the masses in Vatican Square when Rajini says, "This will never work. I can't catch the Pope's eye among all these people. Tell you what, I know all the guards so let me just go upstairs and I'll come out on the balcony with the Pope."

And he disappears into the crowd headed toward the Vatican.. Sure enough, half an hour later Rajini emerges with the Pope on the balcony.

But by the time Rajini returns, he finds that Amitabh Bachan has had a heart attack and is surrounded by paramedics.

Working his way to Amitabh Bachan's side,

Rajini asks him, "What happened?"
Amitabh Bachan looks up and says,
"I was doing fine until u and the pope came out on the balcony and the Italian man next to me said,
"Who's that on the balcony with Rajini?"

HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER!

Rajnikant knows HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER!

Stopped the email...

An email was sent from Mumbai to Pune,

RAJNI stoppd it at Lonavala...

99 best of Rajinikanth...

1. Rajinikanth killed the Dead Sea.
2. When Rajinikanth does push-ups, he isn't lifting himself up. He is pushing the earth down.
3. There is no such thing as evolution,it's just a list of creatures that Rajinikanth allowed to live.
4. Rajinikanth gave Mona Lisa that smile.
5 .Rajnikanth can divide by zero.
6. Rajinikanth can judge a book by it's cover.
7. Rajinikanth can drown a fish.
8. Rajinikanth can delete the Recycle Bin.
9. Rajinikanth once got into a fight with a VCR player. Now it plays DVDs.
10. Rajinikanth can slam a revolving door.
11. Rajinikanth once kicked a horse in the chin. Its descendants are today called giraffes.
12. Rajinikanth once ordered a plate of idli in McDonald's, and got it.
13. Rajinikanth can win at Solitaire with only 18 cards.
14. The Bermuda Triangle used to be the Bermuda Square, until Rajinikanth kicked one of the cornersoff.
15. Rajinikanth can build a snowman out of rain.
16. Rajinikanth can strangle you with a cordless phone.
17. Rajinikanth can make onions cry.
18. Rajinikanth destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise.
19. Rajinikanth can watch the show 60 minutes in 20 minutes.
20. Rajinikanth has counted to infinity, twice.
21. Rajinikanth will attain separate statehood in 2013.
22. Rajinikanth did in fact, build Rome in a day.
23. Rajinikanth once got into a knife-fight. The knife lost.
24. Rajinikanth can play the violin with a piano.
25. Rajinikanth never wet his bed as a child. The bed wet itself in fear.
26. The only man who ever outsmarted Rajinikanth was Stephen Hawking, and he got what he deserved.
27. Rajinikanth can talk about Fight Club.
28. Rajinikanth doesn't breathe. Air hides in his lungs for protection.
29. There are no weapons of mass destruction in Iraq. Rajinikanth lives in Chennai.
30. Rajinikanth kills Harry Potter in the eighth book.
31. Rajinikanth does not own a stove,oven, or microwave, because revenge is a dish best served cold.
32. Rajinikanth has already been to Mars, that's why there are no signs of life there.
33. Rajinikanth doesn't move at the speed of light. Light moves at the speed of Rajinikanth.
34. Rajinikanth knows Victoria's secret.
35. Water boils faster when Rajinikanth stares at it.
36. Rajinikanth can throw the Thackerays out of Mumbai.
37. Rajinikanth kills two stones with one bird.
38. Google won't find Rajinikanth because you don't find Rajinikanth; Rajinikanth finds you.
39. Rajinikanth gave the Joker those scars.
40. Rajinikanth leaves messages before the beep.
41. Rajinikanth once warned a young girl to be good "or else". The result? Mother Teresa.
42. Rajinikant electrocuted Iron Man.
43. Rajinikanth killed Spiderman using Baygon Anti Bug Spray.
44. Rajinikanth can make PCs better than the Mac.
45. Rajinikanth puts the 'laughter' in manslaughter.
46. Rajinikanth goes to court and sentences the judge.
47. Rajinikanth can handle the truth.
48. Rajinikanth can speak Braille.
49. Rajinikanth can dodge Chuck Norris' roundhouse kicks.
50. Rajinikanth can teach an old dog new tricks.
51. Rajinikanth calls Voldemort by his name.
52. Who do you think taught Voldemort Parsel tongue? Rajinikanthdid.
53. Chuck Norris once met Rajinikanth. The result - He was reduced to a joke on the internet.
54. Rajinikanth got small pox when he was a kid. As a result small pox is now eradicated.
55. Rajinikanth's calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd,no one fools Rajanikanth.
56. Rajinikanth grinds his coffee with his teeth and boils the water with his own rage.
57. The last time Rajinikanth killed someone, he slapped himself to do it.The other guy just disintegrated. Resonance.
58. Rajinikanth once had a heart attack. His heart lost.
59. Rajinikant is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.
60. Rajinikanth can run at speed of light around a tree and screw himself.
61.Rajinikant can lick his elbows.
62. Rajinikant once ate an entire bottle of sleeping pills. They made him blink.
63. Rajinikant does not get frostbite. Rajnikant bites frost.
64. Rajinikant doesn't wear a watch. He decides what time it is.
65. Rajinikant got his drivers license at the age of 16 seconds.
66. When you say 'no one is perfect', Rajinikant takes this as a personal insult.
67. In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Rajinikanth could use to kill you, including the room itself.
68. Words like awesomeness, brilliance, legendary etc. were added to the dictionary in the year 1949. That was the year Rajinikanth was born.
69. The statement "nobody can cheat death", is a personal insult to Rajnikanth. Rajni cheats and fools death everyday.
70. When Rajnikanth is asked to kill some one he doesn't know, he shoots the bullet and directs it the day he finds out.
71. Rajinikant can give pain to Painkillers and headache to Anacin.
72. Rajinikanth knows what women really want.
73. Time and tide wait for Rajinikanth.
74. Rajinikanth sneezed only once in his entire life, that's when the tsunami occurred in the Indian ocean.
75. As a child when Rajinikanth had dyslexia, he simply re-scripted the alphabet.
76. Rajinikanth collects Honey from his private Moon - HoneyMoon.
77. Rajinikanth can answer a missed call.
78. Rajinikanth doesn't need a visa to travel abroad, he just jumps from the tallest building in Chennai and holds himself in the air while the earth rotates.
79. Rajinikanth's brain works faster than Chacha Chaudhury's.
80. Rajinikanth doesn't shower. He only takes blood baths.
81. To be or not to be? That is the question. The answer? Rajinikanth.
82. The quickest way to a man's heart is with Rajinikanth's fist.
83. Where there is a will, there is a way. Where there is Rajinikanth, there is no other way.
84. Rajinikanth's every step creates a mini whirlwind. Hurricane Katrina was the result of a morning jog.
85. Rajinikant doesn't bowl strikes, he just knocks down one pin and the other nine faint out of fear.
86. Archaeologists unearthed an old English dictionary dating back to the year 1236. It defined victim as one who has encountered Rajinikant.
87. There is no such thing as global warming. Rajinikanth was feeling cold, so brought the sun closer to heat the earth up.
88. Once a cobra bit Rajinikanth' leg. After five days of excruciating pain, the cobra died.
89. Rajinikanth is a champion in the game "Hide n' seek", as no one can hide from Rajinikanth.
90. Rajinikant proves Newton wrong all the time. Every time he performs an action, he simply eliminates anything and everything that can provide the reaction.
91. Rajinikant is a weapon created by God to use on doomsday to end the world.
92. Aliens do indeed exist. They just know better than to visit a planet that Rajinikanth is on.
93. We live in an expanding universe.All of it is trying to get away from Rajinikanth.
94. If at first you don't succeed, you're not Rajinikanth.
95. Rajinikanth's first job was as a bus conductor. There were no survivors.
96. Rajinikanth does not style his hair. It lays perfectly in place out of sheer terror.
97. When Rajinikanth plays Monopoly, it affects the actual world economy.
98. Rajinikanth is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.
99. Rajinikanth's house has no doors, only walls that he walks through.

The child is now 'Rajnikanth'...

A child went to Kashmir and started playing by making small mountains from ice. 


Today those mountains are called Himalayas and the child is now 'Rajnikanth'

How do you think the Earth spins?

Michael Jordon: I can spin a basketball on my finger for 2 hours.....can you?

Rajinikanth: How do you think the Earth spins?

Sea gives way to The Rajnikanth...

Rajnikanth was originally cast in Titanic


but had to be changed because


even sea gives way to The Rajnikanth

Doesn’t like to handle diamonds...

Rajnikanth doesn’t like to handle diamonds


because he keeps accidentally crushing them...

Dream of Rajnikanth...

The world, as we know it,


is just a dream of Rajnikanth!

The world will not end in 2012...

The world will not end in 2012 ,


Rajanikanth just bought a laptop with 3 year warranty Smile

A girl lost her virginity...

A girl lost her virginity,

Rajni found it and gave it back to her...!!! :p

March 31st to April 2nd...

Rajanikanth' calendar goes straight from

March 31st to April 2nd,

no one fools Rajanikant!

Challenged Superman...

Rajnikanth once challenged Superman.


The loser wore the underwear outside his pants! :D

Rajni warns the compiler !!!

The complier doesn't give rajni warnings... Rajni warns the compiler!!!

Victoria's Secret...

Rajnikanth knows Victoria's Secret.

Truth is sweet - not bitter...

For Rajanikaanth Truth is sweet -  not bitter.

Pain to painkillers...

Rajanikanth can give 


pain to painkillers


and


headache to Anacin...

COBRA was found dead...

Once a COBRA bit Rajanikaanth,


minutes later


COBRA was found dead.

If Rajnikanth beat some one...

If Rajnikanth beat some one,


they disappear such that even google cannot find them!!!

Rajnikant poked him on Facebook...

Facebook founder Mark Zukerberg hospitalised with serious injury...


Rajnikant poked him on Facebook. Innocent

The next moment.. she got pregnant!

Rajnikanth and his wife were having a fight.
She totally pissed him off and in the end rajnikanth showed her the middle finger. 
The next moment.. she got pregnant!

Debugger...

Rajinikanth doesn't need a debugger.


He just stares at the code and the bug confesses. Tongue out

100 meter race - Light...

Rajinikanth participated in 100 meter race and obviously he came first.
But Einstein died after that.....


WHY? 


Because light came second!

Sound - Light...

What travels faster than sound?? 

Its "Light"

I know you were expecting it to be "Rajnikant"
But you know, he cannot be measured Tongue out

Horse - Giraffes...

Rajnikant once kicked a horse in the chin...............
Its descendants are today called giraffesSmile

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