Some sexy and kinky questions for your lover

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1. Would you rather be blindfolded or blindfold me?

2. Would you rather orgasm while performing oral or during intercourse?

3. What was your high school sex fantasy?

4. What’s your favorite position?

5.  Which part of your body do you consider the most sexy?

6.  Do you like to swallow?

7.  Who do you fantasize about when you’re alone?

8. Your last sexual encounter; good or bad and why?

9. Where is one place you would never have sex?

10. Top or bottom?

11.  Best sexual complement you ever got?

12. When was the first time you masturbated?

13.  Have/would you ever have sex outside?

14. Who gave you your last kiss? Did it mean anything?

15.  Do you sleep in pajamas, underwear, or nothing at all?

16.  If you had a sexual “to-do” list, what would be on top of the list?

17. Is a weird “sex face/orgasm face” a total deal breaker?

18. Do you have a gag reflex?

19. Is your sex life award-winning or a total flop?

20. Are piercings sexy?

21. Can/Have you ever squirted before?

22. List your kinks…

Highly erotic, non-veg, adult, sexy sms text and whatsapp messages jokes in hindi - english



Ek Badsoorat randi Choot Marwate Hue
Ek Badsoorat randi Choot Marwate Hue Apne Customer Se Puchti Hai...
"Mere Mein Sabse Khoosurat Cheez Kya Hai ?"
Customer: "Mera Lund………"

****

motka ki biwi
Ek Aadmi Ki Nayi Nahi Shadi Hui, November Ka Mahina Thha Aur Kadake Ki Sardi padd Rahi Thi.
Kamre Mein Aate Hi Vo Rajayi Mein Gussa Aur So Gaya.
Patni Ne Ye Dekha Aur Thodi Der Bad Usko Kohni Mar Ke Boli.
Patni: “Suno Ji, Meri Taango Ke Bich Mein Ek Mori (Hole) Bhi Hai”
Aadmi Gusse Se: “To Band Kar Us Mori Ko, Main Bhi Sochu Rajayi Mein Thandi Hawa Kaha Se Aa Rahi Hai“

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Ladkiyo, Virginity Bachane Ka Sabse Acha Tarika
Suhagrat Par Patni Ke Sath Sex Karne Ke Bad, Pati Bada Khush Tha.
Patni Ke Mathe Ko Chhum Kar Bola.
Pati: “Janu Aaj Bada Maja Aya Aur Main Bahut Khush Hun.”
Patni: “Achha Ji, Kyu?”
Pati: “Tum To Virgin Nikli, Apni Choot Ko Aaj Tak Badi Hifazat Se Bacha Ke Rakha Hai Tumne”
Patni Sharmati Hui: “Aji, Dua Meri Gaand Ko Dijiye, Jiski Wajah Se Aaj Tak Meri Choot Bachi Rahi“

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Mere Yar Ke Ane Ki Khushi Mein
Usta Chodumal Kkhan Sab Ka Ek Bada Hi Khas Dost Usa Se Aa Raha Tha.
Uske Ane Ki Khushi Par Chodumal Khan Ji Ne Ek Sher Arz Kiya.
Kamra Phulo Ki Khusbhu Se Mahka Rakha Hai,
Har Desh Ki Mast Si Randi Ko Bula Rakha Hai,
Na Jane Kiski Choot Pasand Aa Jaye Mere Yaar Ko,
Isliye Har Ladki Ki Kachhi Ko Utarva Rakha Hai.

****

Aaj To Bachhe Ne Doob Hi Jana Thha
Pathan Aur Uska 12 Saal Ka Beta Nehar Mein Naha Rahe Thhe.
Achanak Bete Ka Paanv Slip Hua Aur Vo Dubney Laga, Usne Fatafatt Baap Ki Lulli Ko Pakad Liya.
Pathan Gusse Se: “Bhonsdi Ke Tairna Sikh, Apni Maa Ke Sath Hota To Aaj Doob Hi Jaata.“

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Ladki Ki Aatmkatha, Chudne Ki
Aaye Thhe Wo Itni Der Se Ki Mera Dil Jala Diya,
Pehle Kiwad Band Kiya Fir Deepak Ko Bujha Diya,
Pehle Khel Khelne Lage Mera Seena Tatolkar,
Fir Khel Khelne Lage Apna Underwear Kholkar,
Ek Jang Si Aisi Chid Gayi Mere Palang Par,
Gole Wali Top Rakh Di Usne Meri Surang Par
Yeh Tha Sirf 9 Minute Ka Mazaa,
Ab Bhog Rahi Hu 9 Mahine Ki Saza
9 Mahine Baad Ek Aisa Hoga Visfot,
Jo Ban Jayega Desh Ke Liye Ek Or Vote

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Choot Bahut Mahan Hai, Baba Saxidas
Choot Bahut Hi Mahaan Hai, Iska Andaja Is Bat Se Lagya Ja Sakta Hai Ki Hum Isko Kayi Naamo Se Pukar Sakte Hai, Jaisi Pussy, Yoni, Fuddi, Bhonsdi Aur Khas Kar Teri Maa Ki …… Ke Bad Kuch Bhi Lagao Uska Arath Sirf Choot Se Hi Hota Hai.

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Girlfriend Ki Double Meaning Shayari
Daalte Hi Jhad Gaye Sab, Tika Na Koi Bhi Phool Gale Mein Mere Haar Ke. Dard Unko Hua To Nikaal Liya Maine, Kanta Jo Chubha Pairon Main Sarkar Ke. Cheek Uthay, Chilla Uthay, Kehnay Lagay Meri Na Lo, Ek Hi To Kameez Hai Aur Din Bhi Hain Tyohaar Ka.

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Hiimat Akhir Hai Kis Mein?
Ustad Chodumal Khan Ji Ne Apne Ek Friend Ki Tariff Mein Ek Sher Arz Kiya. Na To Himmat Aap Mein Hai, Aur Na Hi Aapki Haddi Mein, Na To Himmat Aap Mein Hai, Aur Na Hi Aapki Haddi Mein, Himmat To Usme Hai Jo Bina Haddi Ke Aapki Chaddi Mein.

****

gaand pe lekh
1. Gaand khujana :- Chintan karna
2. Gaand ghishna :- Parishram karna
3. Gaand Dikhana :- samasya se door bhagna
4. Gaand mein ungli karna :- Samasya Paida karna
5. Gaand mein balli karna:- Kaam ke liye kisi ko baar baar tokna
6. Gaand Jalna :- Irshya karna
7. Gaand Fatna :- Darr Jana
8. Gaand Marna :- Dushmani Nikalna
9. Gaand Marwana :- Gulami karna
10. Gaand mein Teetar ke Baal hona :- Bahut Active hona
11. Gaand pe Laat marna :- Reject karna
12. Gaand mein Ghushna:- Peeche par jana
13. Gaand Toadna :- Patak kar marna
14. Gaand Chodna :- Peeche se hamla karna
15. Gaand Chatna :- Chamchagiri Karna Aur
16. Gaand mein Keeda:- SMS chahe jitna Lamba ho Pura Padhana

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Class Mein Teacher Ne Pappu Ko Bola
Teacher: “Active Se Passive Mein Badlo. Bache Jab Sunsan Jagah Pe Jate Hai To Haadso Ko Janam Dete Hai?”
Pappu: “Sunsan Jagho Pe Hue Haadse Hi Bacho Ko Janam Dete Hai“

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Waqt nahi ab rone ka
Waqt hai baccha hone ka
tab kyoun nahi royin thi
jab chipak chipak key soi thi
jab kiya hai to bharo
tab kahti thi aur karo aur karo

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Mirza Galib Ki Shayari Suhagrat Par
Shadi Hui To Sher Kaha,
Ghunghat Uthaya To Sher Kaha,
Kapde Utarein To Sher Kaha,
Phir Jab Tangein Uthaain To Bole.
“Le Aayi Phir Kahaan Par Kismat Humain Kahan Se, Ye To Wohi Jagah Hai Nikley They Hum Jahan Se“

****

Mast Kalpana Ek Shayar Ki

29 Ko Vo Naraz Thi,
30 Ko Yaaro Baarat Thi,
1 Ko Mast Suhagraat Thi
2 Ko Pyar Ki Barsaat Thi.
Aankh Khuli To Pata Chala Sapno Ki Kali Raat Thi.
Hath Mein Apna Lund Aur Chaddi Daagdar Thi.

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Baap Re, Kya Gaali Hai

Pappu Ka Ab School Time Pura Ho Chuka Thha Aur Ab Uska College Mein Admission Ho Gaya Thha
Ab Jaisi Aap Logo Ko Pata Hai Ki College Mein Ragging Aam Baat Hai
Ese Hi Senior Students Ne Usko Bulaya Aur Kaha
Senior Students: “Chal Be, Koi Esi Gaali Deke Dikha, Jo Na Kabhi Kisi Ne Suni Ho Aur Na Hi Kisi Ne Kisiko Di Ho”
Pappu: “Hum Sab Juniors Ka Lund Ek Jhopde Me Aur Jhopda Ap Ki Maa Ke Bhoosde Me“

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Piche Kya Lagati Hai Vo
Girl Hostel Me Ek Phone Aaya – “Meena Hai Kya?”
Warden Ne Pucha – “Piche Kya Lagati Hai Vo?”
Phone Wala – “Ab Tho Pata Nahi Ji Par Pehle Sarson Ka Tel Lagati Thi“

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Woh Mangti Thi Mein Detaa Na Thha

Woh Mangti Thi Mein Detaa Na Thha,
Jawaab Uske Sawaal Ka..
Abhi Rakha Hi Thha Ke Chhut Gayaa,
Haath Se Mere Phool Gulaab Ka..
Woh Kehti Thi Peeche Se Nahi Aage Se Karo,
Deedar Mere Husn-e-Shabaab Ka..

Woh Kehti Thi Bada Dard Hota Hai Jab Under Jaata Hai,
Kaano Mein Ik Ik Lafz Janab Ka.

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jab chah thi tab chah thi ab chah nahi ja kutte se chuda ab parwah nahi......

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Boobs Are Smooth And Silky...
Boobs Are Smooth And Silky,
Never Dry Always Pure And Milky,
If You Try, It Gives Power To Your Tower.

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Ek Totli Ladki Suit Rangwane Gayi...
Ek totli ladki suit rangwane ke liye gayi aur rang wale se boli:
"Chut me aisa lund dalna ki chut phat jaye magar lund na nikle"

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Does the Penis have a bone?
Ek Din Class Mein Teacher Ne Bachho Se Pucha:

“Bachho Kya Penis Mein Haddi Hoti Hai?”

Ladkiya: “Yes Mam”

Ladke: “Madam Ji, Inko Kya Pata”

Inhone To Hamesha Khada Hi Dekha Hai“

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What is the difference between a pussy and a cunt?
What is the difference between a pussy and a cunt?
Answer. A pussy is warm, wet and inviting. A cunt is the bitch who owns it.

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2 Men Were Up Bcoz Their Wifes Were Learning Cars:
2 Men Were Up Bcoz Their Wifes Were Learning Cars:

1st: Mere Biwi Raat Ko Lund Pakar Kar Gear Badalti Hay
2nd: Mere Biwi Tang Utha Ke K Kahti Hay 5 Litre Dal Do



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